The Angry Floridian

Clusterfuck in the Gulf

Every time I start thinking about the ongoing BP catastrophe I start foaming at the mouth and then end up getting so pissed I lose track of the points I’d like to advance. Suffice to say, there’s probably more bullshit flowing from Corporate BP than crude from the Deepwater Horizon well and as you’ll see shortly, that’s a whole lot of bullshit!

First off and right after the collapse BP said they were “leaking” maybe a 1000 barrels a day and to me that sounded fairly innocuous given that’s about enough crude to fill a decent sized swimming pool. Then it went to maybe 3000, then 5000 and when they realized some of that shit was floating and folks were going to see and smell it they were forced to admit a “slightly” higher amount. Trouble was/is they were lying their asses off, as now it’s fairly evident there was something around 100,000 barrels a day and that’s a huge F’ing difference! Before I do a little math you need to appreciate the fact that crude oil kills just about everything it touches and if it wasn’t pretty well entombed underground, we, as a species probably wouldn’t be around and if by some small chance we were, trust me on this, things would be a whole lot different. So, lets do a little barnyard math, ‘kay? 85 days times 100,000 is 8,500,000 barrels and at 42 gallons a barrel that comes out somewhere in the vicinity of a whole shitload of stuff that fucks up any and everything it comes in contact with. Oh yeah, you can’t overlook how much dispersant BP injected directly into the plume to hide the actual amount of flow, because that shit is more than likely just as, if not more toxic than the crude itself. So now America’s lake, AKA the Gulf of Mexico, is more akin to a hot tub some fool took a dump in instead of a large source of not only our food, but an ecological area that directly effects Florida as well as a large part of our eastern seaboard. How totally uncool is that? And they think $20 billion is gonna cover it? Yeah, right..

Be that as it may, it appears they’ve finally stopped the flow, at least temporarily, but make no mistake and no matter how much you hear in the coming month’s about how everything gonna’ be just fine, America’s lake isn’t going be the same. Not in my lifetime and very likely not ever.

Anyway, all this leaking/seeping/gushing oil thing got me to wondering just how many damn wells there are in the Gulf and answer was mind blowing to say the least. Ya’know, I’ve spent some time on the redneck riviera and just looking at the derricks/platforms from the beach it appears like someone could walk from Mobile to Galveston on those damn things and not get their feet wet, but the reality is much worse and I mean a hell of a lot worse. Since WWII something like 50,000 wells have been drilled in the Gulf, of those about 23,500 have been abandoned, another 3,500 or so have been”temporarily abandoned,”(whatever the fuck that means) but some have been left that way since the 1950’s and guess what? NOBODY has ever bothered to check ANY of them! WTF? “Regulators at the Minerals Management Service – recently renamed the Bureau of Ocean Energy Management, Regulation and Enforcement – have routinely been accepting industry reports on well closures without inspecting the work. And no one – in industry or government – has been conducting checks on wells that have been abandoned for years.”  Say what???

If that isn’t a fucked up system I don’t know what is.  Heh, if you’re the guy drilling the wells it’s not, otherwise the whole deal pretty much sucks. Consider this, say that 99% of those wells are secure and aren’t leaking,(highly unlikely) that means a couple hundred are, but under the current system we’ll never know! Bottom line, we need regulation, inspection as well as enforcement with sharp teeth, not to mention royalties. I mean, where’s the F’ing Army Corps of Engineers? This sounds like something they’d be well suited to handle, but what do I know? I’m just a schmuck that likes to catch a fish now and then, eat oysters and shrimp and maybe sit on a beach someplace you don’t need a hazmat suit..

As crazy as all that is it’s not just endemic to the oil industry, the same sort of rules govern pretty much all activity on Govt. controlled lands, be it coal mines, gold mines, or oil wells.(natural gas wells have their on set of non-rules thanks to Darth Cheney) Case and point,there’s a privately held foreign company that has a bigass gold mine out west  (Nevada?) somewhere and they pretty much strip mine the desert for gold and silver, nobody cares much that they devastate the land because it’s a fucking desert and there isn’t much there besides rattlesnakes and scorpions, but guess what? These guys don’t pay us a damn dime for the gold! They come in and mine the desert, mix in a bunch of toxic shit like mercury and then extract the gold, their only benefit to this country are a few jobs, is that a sweet deal, or what? I mean what other country would go for a sham deal like that? I dunno for sure, but other than maybe Nigeria not too many. As far as I can tell this all started after the civil war when we needed to generate money and used our vast natural resources to that end, but that was over 150 years ago and times, as well as the need to rape our country for a few jobs has long since past, especially so when you realize they don’t ever pay royalties. Don’t get me wrong here, I’m not saying to stop it completely, I’m saying we need to control who does what and make damn sure they not only pay us, but are on the hook if anything should EVER go wrong, this giving away of our resources has got to stop! If you wanna play, dig, drill, or mine you gotta pay and if you find something worthwhile you gotta pay more, if you can’t deal with that there’s always Nigeria..

Till next time, keep your eyes wide and don’t let the bastards beat you down…

T3

We, as a nation, are pretty much reactionary, that is, we always seem to be either looking for someone to blame, or trying to pass laws to fix whatever mess we find ourselves in at the moment and hardly ever address the reasons.  It doesn’t matter whether it’s immigration, energy, health care, or our bullshit wars on (fill in the blank)_______. Sadly, solving the actual cause seems to be always just beyond our grasp. Don’t believe me? Well, lets take a look at illegal immigration for instance.

The last time I checked, most, if not ALL of the illegals that show up in our nation are not here to vacation, or to check out the sights, they’re here to work, but when was the last time anyone heard of an employer fined, much less going to jail for hiring illegals? It just doesn’t happen, (often enough) or with any regularity and given so many of our fellow countryman are unemployed these days you have to wonder why. There’s little doubt some employers use illegals for lower wages and a quick check of the law shows why, there isn’t any penalty, or if there is it’s waived, or never enforced because there isn’t anyone ever around to enforce it. A few years back laws were passed that mandated social security number checks, only problem is they take many months and really do nothing except to check the validity of the number, BFD! How about we take a little from the wing-nut whack jobs out in Arizona and make employers demand a real birth certificate, naturalization papers, or green cards that actually match a SS number as prerequisite for ANY AND ALL employment in this country? Sounds pretty simple doesn’t it, but without any teeth it doesn’t mean a squat. However, put a hundred thousand dollar fine for the first infraction and real, no bullshit, go straight to jail time for the next and I think you’ll see change pretty damn fast! Of course we need control of our frontiers just like most every other nation does, whether that means walls,  surveillance, or whatever, it doesn’t really matter, but in the end the single most effective way to reduce illegal immigration will still be holding employers accountable, it’s just common sense, at least to me. BTW, I strongly feel Arizona’s new law is not just ill advised, it’s an outright affront to the constitution. Heh, can you imagine trying to implement such bullshit here in Florida? Yeah, I’m thinkin’ that would workout good. (maybe fuckin’ not!) If you think an illegal alien is some dude driving a car with a foreign flag and a La Cucaracha horn you might wanna think again, if not take a drive down through Okeechobee, Belle Glade, or cruise Calle Ocho and Hialeah, see how that works out and get back to me. The problem, or cause lies firmly on employers and really no one else, handle them and watch illegal immigration become much more manageable and you can pretty much take that to the bank..

Till next time, keep your eyes open and don’t let the bastards beat you down…

T3

For those who are age challenged, the term “silent majority” was resurrected by ole’ tricky Dick (Nixon) and was meant to represent the hard working middle class. You know, those smucks who were laboring to achieve, or hold on to a piece of the American Dream, that is, own a home and offer their children a better way. To many of us our home was like a savings account, we invested in it, took care of it knowing that if, or when the time came and we needed it’s equity it would be there. Well, guess what? It’s apparent now that not only did a few of our largest banks game the American Dream to fail, they actually bet big fuckin’ bucks that it would and when it did and the whole house of cards started to crumble, we, the taxpayers had to bail the rat bastards out! (For some very good, but extremely scary insight see Matt Taibbi’s page at RollingStone.com) This has got to be the greatest robbery and extortion in the history of mankind, but it gets even better.(for them) It looks as if no one is going to prison, is this a great country, or what? I mean, just imagine for a second if  Al Qaeda  had orchestrated this deal, hell, the whole middle east would be a glass parking lot by now, but these greedy asshats get a pass? Fuck that and fuck them!

So, where’s the silent majority? I mean WTF? Don’t they care that a few rich and greedy assholes swiped a whole bunch, if not all of their hard earned security? I don’t know about you, but when somebody steals from me I get pissed and whether you buy in to this drivel, or not you’ll be hard pressed for an explanation other than outright theft followed a huge dose of extortion. It’s not the first time either, Google the saving and loan B/S back in the 80’s and while there are other examples of their greed/theft this one is most definitely the greatest, so far.

Here’s the big question, who’s fault is/was it? Most want to point fingers everywhere but the obvious, either that, or they say it was a “complex situation” that just got away from them. BULLSHIT, there are a few complex things in life, but this ain’t one of ‘um! The government let us down, of that there’s no doubt, but why? MONEY, that’s why! Money has corrupted our government and both political party’s and until we, as a nation take careful and lasting steps to remove it’s overwhelming influence from our political system we can only look forward to the next bursting bubble, but do absolutely nothing to avoid it.  I’m not just talking about Wall st. either, money is, or was the root cause on how most things got fucked up in this country, from illegal immigration, to health care, to the housing market, to education, not to mention our ever expanding militarism, it’s all about money and who has the power to manipulate our government to make the most the easiest and until every last lobbyist and political action committee are run out of DC (or put behind bars) “ain’t nothing gonna’ change”…

Till next time, keep your eyes open and don’t let the bastards beat you down…

T3

Sorry I haven’t been posting of late, but  the massive amount of bullshit has been a bit overwhelming. It’s like there isn’t time to savor the anger generated by these idiots before they spew some new crap, it’s almost as if there’s some contest to see who can spread the most garbage the fastest..

Remember the earthquake down in Haiti? Absolutely terrible things happened to folks that didn’t have a pot to piss in to begin with and then that great Christian Pat Robertson claimed they deserved it because of a deal made with the “devil” for their freedom a hundred fifty years ago, WTF? Heh, I guess  Pat’s God is old school,(testament) but speaking of dudes that deal with the devil, wasn’t Pat trying to cut one for a piece of a diamond/gold mine with Charles Taylor when he was running Liberia? Y’all remember Charlie doncha’? I guess Pat was able to look past the fact that Taylor was an evil butchering bastard, but unfortunately for Pat and his mining dreams it didn’t work out and Charlie’s currently awaiting trail in the Hague for crimes against humanity. So tell me, who was dealing with the devil?

The fear mongers have been at it full tilt too, remember the underwear bomber? This troubled dude sat out to destroy a plane full of folks with a bomb in his underwear, unfortunately (for him) only to scorch his nads, but lo and behold he had “ties to Al queda!” More bullshit! If Al Queda, or Joe Blow for that matter, wanted to blow up planes they’d be falling like rain in a summer thunderstorm. There’d be no need for panty bombs, you see, next to none of the air freight, or US mail is ever inspected and it sits right beneath your seat! The TSA does essentially nothing to make your air trip safer, they do however spend a shitload of money trying to make you feel that way. There’s two ways to use aircraft as terror weapons. One, you just blow it up with a device in the cargo, or you commandeer the cockpit and use it as a (human)guided missile. To stop the latter all that’s needed is a secure cockpit, the former takes inspection just like passenger’s. Folks, this is common sense, but these days there looks to be little use for that when scare tactics work so well.

Then there’s ignorance and what a bountiful harvest we have! Take the Teabaggers for instance, I don’t think I have ever seen a group so completely fucked up and trust me I’ve seen a few. When you take a hard look at these folks, their “big socialist government” bullshit aside,  it’s very difficult not to think they’re driven by racism. I mean, where the fuck were they when Georgie Boy was starting wars and looting our treasury, not to mention Katrina as well as a myriad of other blunders including the one on 9/11/01, but what really gets me is their over the top dumbfuckery when it comes to healthcare. Here is a group of people who are doing their utmost to help an insurance industry that has never saved a life, never came with a new procedure and as far as I can tell just takes money off the top of everything, but why? Is it their hate of socialism, or do they believe folks that can’t afford healthcare somehow deserve their lot, or is it just veiled racism/classism? First of all lets examine their socialism cry, I shouldn’t mention that most of these people wouldn’t recognize socialism if it ran over them in a Wal-Mart parking lot, I mean when you rant about not socializing Medicare your argument takes a big hit right off the bat, doncha’ think? I also hear that, well, you know if the govt gets involved they’ll screw it up. Heh, if that’s the case we need to get all those nuclear weapons away from the Govt before they, well, you get my drift. So, no, I don’t think that’s the issue that’s driving their madness and that pretty much leaves the class thing, i e, because they’re poor they deserve no healthcare, either that, or it’s just racism by another name, but in any event, it’s fucked up for sure!

Ignorance isn’t just involved with healthcare, let’s review the “war on drugs” too, okay? We’ve been “at war” now for over a generation and to what end? Well, if you’re into spending untold billions incarcerating millions of folks for just getting a buzz I guess the “war” is worth it, but it hasn’t done squat otherwise. Pot is everywhere, but what really drove this home to me was a couple years ago when Georgie Boy said we’re losing the “war.” OMFG, really? I realized he was setting the stage for more money and not actually giving an honest appraisal, but it got me to thinking. Here we are, a country that spends more than the next ten nations combined on defense and we’re getting our asses handed to us by a bunch of dopers, WTF? I dunno about you, but there’s an old saying about throwing good money after bad that I think we should heed. Legalize it, tax it and move on. Oh yeah, don’t forget to let the half million or so non-violent drug offenders out of prison too…

Till next time, keep your eyes open and don’t let the bastards beat you down…

T3

Sorry it took so long for me to actually do something with this turn-key blog you set up, but as you know the holidays this year were fairly somber, not to mention I had to reconcile this ‘anger” tag you hung on me.

Let there be no mistake, I_am _angry and not just a little pissed-off either, though it may be surprising exactly what has lit and keeps my fire going. For instance, do lying politicians set me off? Not so much, I learned a long time ago most of those no-good bastards will say, or promise anything to anyone they believe they want to hear and it doesn’t make any difference how off the wall crazy it is, For instance, the other day Mr. 9/11 (Rudy Juliani) had the audacity to proclaim that Obama should conduct himself more like Bush because we never had a terrorist attack when he was Prez. See what I mean?

How about Darth, err, Dick Cheney, you think he pisses me off? Nope, though I think it’s ten miles past ironic that a guy who was in an “undisclosed location” for almost eight years and went as far to even pressure Google to pixelate his residence for security reasons now can’t seem to stay out of the footlights, though to his credit all this current exposure might have less to do with causing trouble for Obama than with keeping his sorry ass out of prison.

You think all this partisan bullshit in Congress gets me going? Nah, politics always has and (sadly) probably always will be about power. Who has it and who wants it.

No, these things and many more just as insane don’t really make me see black, what makes me angry is that very few people are as angry as I am. I fear it’s becoming like what the Boss (Springsteen) described in Born in the USA.

“You end up like a dog that’s been beat too much
‘Til you spend half your life just covering up”

A whole class of people so use to being beat up by the system they just accept it and that makes me totally crazy! For instance; We’re fairly close to having some sort of new healthcare plan and if I understand it correctly,  something like 47 million people in this country have no healthcare at all and another 50 million are woefully under covered. During all the very partisan debates where in the hell were they? I saw some bat-shit crazy tea-baggers, but I’ll be damned if I saw any demonstrations by the ones that truly need  single payer healthcare and as bad as that is, it gets worse, a lot F’ing worse!

I’m pissed that we allowed our country’s perversion because of fear and lies generated by energy company’s and delivered by our so-called leaders, but I’m super PO’d that those responsible are not being held accountable.

I’m pissed because we water-boarded folks and said it wasn’t torture, even though we executed a few Japanese after WWII for the very same thing.

I’m pissed because we’ve been exposed to sooo much 24/7 bat-shit crazy hypocrisy  we think it’s normal.

I’m very pissed because no one will, or can tell me where 800 billion dollars that George Bush stole during his last month in office actually went.

I’m pissed because we started an unjust war against a sovereign nation, (for no reason other than oil) though I admit I’m probably not as ‘miffed’ as the family’s of the million, or so that’s been killed so far.

I’m mad because our country is no longer for and by the people. It’s more like, by the Corps. for the rich, people be damned.

I’m mad and tired of wars too! It seems like this country’s been fighting, or, at the very least, bombing the snot out of somebody all my life and even though there are most certainly things worth fighting and dying for, all wars pretty much suk! Especially the war on drugs and terrorism, not only are they totally unwinnable, the first casualties were some of the very freedoms our country was founded on.

But mostly I’m mad at my generation. You see,  I thought we’d “change and rearrange the world,” unfortunately at some forgotten moment we started down the dark side. Now, whether it ends up consuming us all isn’t clear at this time, but for damn sure it’s already taken a couple pounds of flesh.

So yeah, I may have an issue, or five, but if you’d been around the block in this rabbit hole world as many times as I have, well, you get my drift..

Till next time,

keep your eyes open and don’t let the bastards beat you down…

T3

BTW, We’ll be getting rid of that damn grove spider as soon as I figure out how!

Hi, Dad. You’re visiting your new blog right now. Pretty cool, eh?

For a long time now, you’ve been a rabid Internet consumer. You’ve read hundreds (maybe even thousands) of articles linked from Reddit and you’ve never once made a significant contribution back to the greater community. Instead, you call me or rant at your wife about the corruption of our inglorious police state. That’s fine by me, and I expect that to continue, but what reason do you have not to share your unapologetic blathering with the rest of the Internet? Now that you have this fancy new blog, nothing stands in your way! Share your ferocity with the huddled masses and save on your cell phone bill by calling me slightly less!

As you’ve probably seen by now, I named your blog “The Angry Floridian” and pointed the ever so catchy angryfloridian.com to it. Given how absurdly awesome and accurate the name is, you may think that it came naturally. Sadly, this was not the case. The name was only decided on after several years of demographic research and double blind user satisfaction studies. In fact, I’m so confident that the name will guarantee success for someone, somewhere doing something, that I’ll mock you endlessly if you don’t like it. Regardless though, you’re stuck with it for a year. Try to get used to it. I know this will be difficult for you because such grandiose things are infrequently bestowed to you. Should you need assistance, e-mail me or call me and I might get back to you about it. I’m not here to make promises.

In anticipation of the inevitable question, “What should I write about?”, I’ve prepared a list of topics that you can explore at your leisure:

1. police raid innocent man’s house, <shoot, smash, or otherwise harm> precious <list of possessions>
2. insurance companies <shove, push, force> <medical instrument> into the public’s <orifice>
3. government <wire taps, steals, rapes, burns> every citizen’s <rss reader, sewage line, Internet connection, favorite beer>
4. fishing for <fish, tires, guns, love>
5. Florida’s <corrupt, evil, tyrannical, racist, homophobic, sexy> government officials have <poisoned the swamps, sold some precious public asset, killed babies, maimed squirrels, donned afro wigs, persecuted the innoncent>.
6. list of reasons Titusville sucks and Cocoa is awesome
7. Fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu comics
8. Harley Davidson motorcycles are awesome, except when they leak <type of fluid> and <catch on fire, burst into flames>, which is <all the time, hardly never>
9. <American motorcycle racer> is <awesome, bad ass> compared to <foreign motorcycle racer> who has a <funny accent, stupid motorcycle, boyfriend/husband>
10. Dennis Kucinich’s wife is <bangin’, super> hot

Should you decide that blogging isn’t your “thing”, my emotional well being will be irreparably harmed. It’s likely that we’ll never speak again and I will become a vagrant, begging for food or used clothing whenever passers-by make eye contact with me. Know that your friends and our family will rightly blame you for this tragedy. All you had to do was use the awesome laptop I gave you to produce something.

That is all. Merry Christmas!